And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing or situation - some fact of my life - unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place , thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment. Nothing absolutely nothing happens by mistake.” AA
So why is acceptance so important?
If we can’t accept our current situation, in any of the above aspects of our lives, then we are fighting against an impossible victory, as we have no control over other people, places, things or situations, the only control we have, is over ourselves, our thoughts and our situation.
The Serenity Prayer
“Grant us the serenity to accept the things we cannot change
The courage to change the things we can
And the wisdom to know the difference”
Once we accept we can’t change people, places, things and situations, learning to accept our lives as they are, becomes easier and our lives begin to flow. Once we begin to accept and stop fighting, we can only then see clearly how we can implement changes in our lives to become happier. Every persons perspective of happiness varies, but one thing we can all agree on is we all want to be happy.
Once our focus shifts from the unacceptable, to the acceptable we are able to see with gratitude what we already have in our lives that brings us joy and happiness, we can then attract more of the same, by the law of attraction.
Why is acceptance so difficult?
Fear is the driving force for us not accepting change and preventing us from being able to accept the unacceptable to us.
This fear can be paralysing, it stops you from moving forward and keeps you stuck in the familiar turmoil that is destructive but comfortable.
Fear is created when you have to face the unknown, when you can’t control your environment or someone else. The avoidance of fear can take shape in many forms and is often destructive behaviour which is why, facing your fears is so important. If we face our fear we remain in control but if we don’t our fears take control of us, preventing us from moving through and past our limitations.
How do we change our behaviour around fear?
If you can change your perception of fear, from something you need to run from, to something that can teach you more about yourself, where you can grow, strengthen and empower yourself then fear stops being so controlling and becomes a teacher.
In the western world we have a deep seated need to fix ourselves. To change the way we feel immediately, whether that be with alcohol, food, sex, drugs, shopping, gambling, over exercising etc etc etc.
Why can’t we sit with uncomfortable feelings? Is it because we have just never been taught that to not feel OK, is actually OK!
Actually its more than OK, as this is where we develop, grow and learn about ourselves at our core.
This process won’t evolve overnight, it is always a slow progression but with consistency of sitting in self awareness, built through meditation and journaling, you will grow and face your fears, however big or small. Empowering you to not only accept the unacceptable, face your fears but make fundamental changes within your life to reach your full potential.
Fear creates a very tangible, physical response. Sometimes this is just a raised heart rate and sometimes crippling anxiety.
Breathe meditation is very successful in tackling both the physical and emotional symptoms of fear. This simple practice will calm the parasympathetic nerve and reduce the production of cortisol and adrenaline, which flood the body when experiencing fear. This practice allows you take back control and make rational decisions that will positively affect your life.
Letting go of the outcome?
So you face your fears and the outcome doesn’t quite work out as you want it to. What now?
This is where faith and trusting that you are exactly where you should and need to be comes in. Allowing the universe, god, spirit or however you choose to reference a force greater than yourself, guide you is completely freeing. Knowing that you have put the action in, listened to your gut, followed your path, faced your fears and then listened to your higher power will give you a peaceful, serene life, knowing you are exactly where you are supposed to be.
This sounds so easy but as we all know it isn't, as we have an inert need to control and manipulate our circumstances, which is completely normal and all part of being human.
Through this spiritual growth you will be able to let go of the outcome and see that every given situation offer an opportunity to learn and grow.